The boy with a thorn in his side.

...Behind the hatred there lies a murderous desire for love.

I've been doing alright lately. I'm upset that I had to leave my job in the fashion business, but on the bright side, I'm guaranteed a spot back in the future. It's somewhat of a bittersweet feeling. I chose school over a dream job. It's quite alright though...School comes before everything else. I have to learn how to walk before I run.

I've been really doing well with my photography lately. Everything is coming out very sharp and well developed. I'm really happy with how everything turned out. Thank you to everyone who could make my photos lovely. Congrats to my friend Carol on being the number 1 and 3 photo on my flickr, and to DC for being number 2.

My past week was a bit more fun than usual. I had to get my transfer to SPC settled, and now everything is all good. DC and I had a very great photoshoot. I'm glad that the outcome was better than expected. Thank you for being a great model!

I made food for Carol twice this week. I enjoy cooking a lot. I'm always at ease. If you're reading this Carol, I hope you enjoyed it!! Carol and I also headed to my hometown in New Jersey. The two of us got away from the hectic city, and decided to kick it in "Chilltown Jersey City". We watched Valkyrie, and it was a lot better than I expected. Afterwards, we headed to Komegashi and had some deliciouus Japanese food. The day ended with taking Carol home. I had a blast. Carol. you're too cool. Let's do it again sometime soon.

Content with life right now. I'm always hoping for the better.

Jersey City State of Mind

Thanks Will for being my model.
-peace

1968

Sitting in my basement...BeeGees on blast. Fucking hallelujah

Happy Birthday Lola
and Tiffany

Modal Soul

Fierce scarf!

It may seem a bit unorthodox, but I haven't celebrated Christmas yet. My family does it a bit different. You see, being a Philipino, we're very cheap people. We'd rather pay little and recieve a lot of labor, rather than pay much and do very little. This is probably one of the very few things about the Philippines that I actually admire. We tend to work very hard for money, and we don't take it for granted. That's besides the point. Sure, who doesn't deserve the fruits of our parents' labour, especially when everything after the holidays goes on sale. Everyone is always rushing to give beofre the 25th, but I guess you can say my family thinks ahead. There's never anything wrong with saving money. The more money, the better, right? Maybe. I probably sound like a fool for saying this, but...money really isn't everything to me. It doesn't make me that happy. Sure, I'll get excited when I recieve it, but it's more about what I do with it. I almost have everything I want. I work for the fashion industry, I have a great family, I have supportive friends, and I have more. Maybe I'm still feeling the after effects of what that bitch did to me. i've moved on, but the thought of girls like her really set off a bomb in me. I think I'm missing the companionship I'm used to having all year round. I've never been too long without a partner in crime. There's nothing wrong with wanting to give yourself to someone. Trial, and error is what it is. I've dealt with three women, and learned three different things. I feel like this chapter is ending. It's sad that it had to end on a blue note, but I'm looking forward to the next chapter. Maybe this fall I could have a new scene before me. France, California, Chicago, Boston? I'll go wherever life takes me. As for now, I'll continue to lose weight. I'm down to 178. I miss my old physique =/. I'll get a haircut prior to the new semester. I'lll invest in a new wardrobe. I'm getting rid of most of my dunks. To me, those are just high school relics. I have a great feeling for 09. 08 had it's ups and downs. More downs, than ups. Overall, I'm a lot stronger than I used to be, a lot more talented, open minded, and determined. Point..focus...CLICK!

A Better View of the Rising Moon.

Snow...How lovely...

It's another late night/early morning for me. I don't know how many of you read my blog, but it helps me vent out and knock out. I have a heavy load on my head right now(what's new?). I want a cigarette but I'm trying to kick the habit. The pain in my left arm is unbearable. I sprained a ligament and now I can't move my fingers. I was thinking of going somewhere far away. Perhaps a change of scenery for me is needed. CalArts was one of my options. I know for a fact that California is a very laid back place. It's no place for an eastern city slicker. I love the city though. It would be very difficult for me to leave for the fact that I would miss everyone here. It's not the people that I will miss, because I would be missing the feeling of wandering around this concrete jungle. I've been told that I was a laid back person, and that California is where I belong. I have a feeling that they're wrong. I feel like an extraordinary being on this side of the country. I have the California mindset, but I have the instincts and street smarts of a New Yorker. I feel like Ferdinand, from the children's book "The Story Of Ferdinand" written by Munro Leaf. The book is about a bull who would rather smell the flowers rather than clash with matadors. The East Coast is generally in a hurry 100% of the time, but as for me, I like walking slow and observing the people on the street and the scenery. Capturing the moments of this infinite feeling through a camera makes me feel at peace. It's at those moments where I can die happy. Everyone is rushing to get somewhere but I'm in no rush at all. People are walking past me at a faster pace while I just fade into the back. I know I'm not a person who likes responsibilities. If I had a choice, I would wander around the city capturing photos all day, and everyday. What exactly is the purpose of a human being? Like Ferdinand, people expected him to fight because he was a bull. A human? I usually expect humans to work for money. Don't get me wrong, money is important, but people don't really take time to enjoy the finer things in life. It's not my problem, but it troubles me. To leave, or to go...that is the question. I love California, but I belong in New York City. Besides, above the skyscrapers, the city has a better view of the rising moon.

I used to be a devil...

A vision of hell within the depths of Tigertron

You just reminded me of how much I hate you. What you've done is unforgivable. I used to be a devil to people I knew, but you're bringing back the devil in me.